


An Unlikely Conversation

by torigates



Category: Bones (TV), Fringe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-11
Updated: 2013-11-11
Packaged: 2018-01-01 03:55:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1040047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torigates/pseuds/torigates
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A list of Cam’s likes would include alcohol and bars comma sitting at. A list of her dislikes would include mind-numbingly boring conferences on psychology. Put those three things in a room together, and it is decidedly <i>unsurprising</i> to find Cam sitting at the bar while numerous talks on psychology went on in the background.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Unlikely Conversation

  
Cam was at the bar.

The fact of Cam being at a bar is not in itself a surprising one. A list of Cam’s likes would include alcohol and bars comma sitting at. A list of her dislikes would include mind-numbingly boring conferences on psychology. Put those three things in a room together, and it is decidedly _unsurprising_ to find Cam sitting at the bar while numerous talks on psychology went on in the background. A person might wonder, then, why Cam was attending such a conference, and she could cite a wide variety of reasons for her attendance, the first and foremost of those being having a boyfriend who _was_ interested in such things, followed closely by her desire to take vacations and the infrequency in which the opportunity to do so arose.

So when the opportunity did arise for Cam to go with Sweets to the psychology conference in Boston that he had been talking about endlessly for the months leading up to it, Cam jumped at the chance. She figured time away from the lab with her boyfriend in a different city had to be worth it. A few boring panels wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Except a few boring panels quickly turned into a few boring days, and Cam was starting to think that dealing with corpses would be a preferable use of her time. Or a more intellectually stimulating use of her time, at the very least.

Hence the bar. It made things so much easier.

The bartender struck up conversation with her on the second day, and Cam was pleased to find he had a surprising interest in forensic science (she blamed the multiple crime shows on television these days, and had lots of fun debunking a number of popular myths that the media tended to get so very wrong), and the two of them had several lively and enjoyable conversations in between Sweets running back and forth to check up on her and make sure she was having a good time. Cam would smile and kiss him each time, and then send him back to his friends.

On the third day, there was another permanent resident at the bar. The woman was petite with short curly black hair. She was ripping the label off a bottle of beer and looked about as bored as Cam felt.

“Not thrilled to be here?” Cam finally asked her when the woman had moved on to ripping up the napkin she had previously been using as a coaster.

The woman looked over. She smiled and shrugged. “I have to be here for work.”

“What’s work?” Cam asked, turning on her chair to properly face the woman. She had been on the receiving end of enough people chatting her up in bars to know when a person was desperate to talk to someone and when their body language screamed “scram!” Cam figured this woman wouldn’t bite her head off if Cam wanted to engage her in a bit of conversation. Plus, Cam liked to consider herself _slightly_ more entertaining than tearing various paper products to shreds.

“I work for the FBI,” she answered.

Cam startled a bit at that. “Me too,” she said. “Sort of.”

“Sort of?” The woman turned to face her properly now, and Cam was pleased to have someone else to entertain her. She figured Jack-the-bartender had to be a little sick of her.

“I’m Dr. Camille Saroyan. I work at the Jeffersonian Institution in collaboration with the FBI,” she paused. “Basically that means I work with a bunch of crazy scientists and we solve crime.”

The woman laughed and laughed for a very long time. When she could breathe again she held out her hand. “Agent Astrid Farnsworth.” They shook hands.

Through her chuckling, Cam was able to ascertain that Astrid worked for a more classified division of the FBI, but that a large part of her job involved working with crazy scientists and solving crime. “You just summed up what I do for a living perfectly,” Astrid told her.

“What do you say it like that?” Cam asked. She moved over one stool so that they were now sitting side by side.

“Like what?” she asked, a look of genuine puzzlement on her face.

“I could practically hear the air quotes around ‘crazy scientists’ and ‘crime’,” Cam said with a smile.

Astrid laughed again. “Well, it’s more like ‘mad scientist’ singular,” she allowed. “And the type of crime that we solve is...” she trailed off. “Unusual.”

“Unusual?”

“To put it mildly.”

Cam nodded, accepting this without further questions. She knew what it was like to have to keep certain things discrete, and it was obvious that Astrid was all that she could.

“We have a cow,” Astrid blurted after a moment.

“Excuse me?” Cam asked, almost choking on the sip of her drink she had just taken. She was sure she had heard the other woman wrong.

Astrid grinned. “We have a cow. At our lab. Sometimes I have to milk her.”

Cam stared.

“Her name is Gene,” Astrid continued. “She’s friendly enough. For a cow.”

“Are there unfriendly cows?” Cam asked, unsure what to do with the information that there were labs out there that were homes to cows. Labs that solved crimes, being residence to bovine animals was a strange concept to Cam.

Astrid looked genuinely puzzled at this question, and considered it for a long moment before answering. “I would imagine so. I mean, cows aren’t that different to humans,” she paused. “Genetically speaking, I mean. So I would imagine there would be unfriendly cows, just like there are unfriendly humans.”

This made a lot of sense to Cam. Though, she had consumed several drinks by this point, so she couldn’t be sure just how sound Astrid’s logic really was. The bar tender was smirking, which indicated to Cam that it probably didn’t make a whole lot of sense.

“I thought the beetles were bad enough,” Cam commented thoughtfully.

“Beetles?”

“Your lab has a cow, mine has beetles. And an entomologist.”

Astrid winced sympathetically, as if she understood the trouble that entomologists with a penchant for performing experiments could cause. Then again, her lab had a cow, so she probably did. She paused as if considering something. “Though given half a chance, I’m sure Walter would jump at getting some beetles in the lab.”

“Walter?”

“Walter Bishop, my mad scientist.” She smiled fondly. Cam considered the affection she felt for her own mad scientists, Dr. Brennan, Dr. Hodgins, and the various interns (when they weren’t driving her crazy), and smiled affectionately herself. She knew all too well what it was like to love those crazy people, almost against her will.

“Bishop... the name sounds familiar,” Cam said.

“It probably does,” Astrid allowed. “The man’s a genius, and has been around for ages.” She paused again. “I’m also quite certain he’s certifiably insane.”

Astrid launched into a detailed story about the multiple occasions on which Walter had gotten high at their lab, whether on acid or other suitably strong illegal substances. Cam listened half in horror, half in awe, and couldn’t help but marvel at how much harder her job would be if Hodgins regularly showed up high to work, or—heaven forbid—Dr. Brennan.

“The worst I’ve had to deal with is Agent Booth a bit dopey on pain meds,” Cam said sympathetically. And a brief case of amnesia.”

Astrid waved her had, like a case of amnesia would be the least of her worries. The more the two women talked, the more Cam could believe it was.

“What’s Agent Booth like?” Astrid asked after a moment.

Maybe it was the multiple drinks she had consumed. Maybe it was the extreme boredom, but Cam found herself going into more detail than she normally would. About Booth. About her history with Booth. About Dr. Brennan and Booth and their torrid relationship.

“So basically they’re in love with each other, they’ve admitted that they’re in love, and yet they’re still not together,” Cam concluded. During her long tale Astrid had bought the two of them another round of drinks. “Sweets could tell you more about the whys, but basically I’ve just stopped trying to understand the reason they’re not together and am just hoping that they’ll figure it out.”

“Who’s Sweets?” Astrid asked. She looked riveted. Cam had to acknowledge that when she laid the whole story out at once, it was pretty entertaining. No wonder she and Angela (and Sweets) and been following the Booth-and-Brennan saga so avidly for years.

Cam scanned the crowd until she found a familiar mop of dark curly hair. “Uh, he’s an FBI psychologist,” she coughed. “And my boyfriend.” She pointed him out to Astrid. “He’s the reason I’m here,” she said. “I wanted to have a few days vacation away from work with him. But I hadn’t factored in how much he loves to talk shrink shop.” She laughed.

Astrid smiled. “So let me get this straight,” she said. “You’re dating an FBI psychologist—”

“Who often consults on our cases,” Cam cut in.

“You’re dating an FBI psychologist you work with,” Astrid amended. “And your lead scientist and FBI agent are in love?”

Cam nodded. “And Hodgins—he’s the entomologist—is married to Angela—another member of our team.”

“Wow,” Astrid said. “And I thought inter-office relationships were complicated where I work.”

Cam just laughed. “That’s not even the craziest part. One of my old employees is currently serving a twenty year sentence in a mental ward for helping a cannibalistic serial killer.” Cam felt that old familiar wave of sadness wash over her at the mention of Zach.

“I think I technically have that one beat,” Astrid said with a bit of a smile. “But it’s top secret, so I’ll let you have the win.”

Cam laughed at that.

Astrid launched into a story about the two people she worked with—Olivia and Peter—who also clearly had feelings for each other, and who were technically together, but there was, and Astrid paused here as if not sure how exactly to put it, another woman who had recently gotten between them. Astrid wasn’t sure they were going to make it.

“It makes you glad to be on the outside, doesn’t it?” Cam asked.

Astrid laughed. “It does. I’m glad not to be involved in that drama. I keep my personal life personal.”

Cam blushed.

“No offense,” Astrid hurried on.

Cam waved her off. “None taken.”

The two women continued to chat about how simultaneously similar and different their professional atmospheres were, the perks and annoyances of working with geniuses, what it was like to be continually around dead, decomposed, and disgusting bodies, and their different coping mechanisms (Cam liked to take long baths, Astrid went for walks, they both agreed on copious amounts of chocolate intake), and before Cam knew it, Sweets was coming up to her, and asking if she was ready to head back to their room and get ready for dinner.

She smiled and kissed him in greeting. “This is Agent Farnsworth,” Cam said introducing them.

“Pleasure to meet you,” Sweets said, holding out his hand. “Dr. Lance Sweets.”

“Don’t worry,” Cam told him. “I’ve already told her everything about you. I’m sure Astrid feels like she already knows you.”

“All good things, I hope,” Sweets said with a lopsided grin. Cam was reminded just how lucky she was to be with him.

Astrid smiled. “Of course. And I take it you’re the world’s most knowledgeable authority on the ongoing Booth and Brennan epic love story.”

Sweets’ entire face lit up. “Dude, I am!”

He took a breath, and Cam knew she had better intervene, before the three of them were trapped there for hours.

“We’d better go if we want to make dinner,” Cam said to him.

He nodded, and the two of them gathered their things. “It was a pleasure meeting you,” Cam said.

“More fun than a psychology conference?” Astrid asked.

“Loads,” Cam assured her. She handed Astrid her card. “If you’re ever in D.C. look me up.”

Astrid smiled. “I will.”

As they walked away, Cam smiled to herself. She was about to have dinner with her boyfriend, and she made a new friend who understood just how crazy, complicated, and confusing work drama could be. There were definitely worse ways she could have spent her vacation. She squeezed Sweets’ hand, and he smiled down at her, pulling her close as they walked arm and arm. There were definitely worse ways she could have spent her vacation (and she didn’t even have to look at a dead body once). 


End file.
